How to Deal With Conflict in Relationships

assalamualaikum



Conflict is going to happen in your love life. Here are some ways to keep it from damaging your relationship.

1. Conflict is going to happen in any relationship. There are healthy ways to deal with conflict and unhealthy ways.
2. If you deal with conflict in the following ways, you can kill your relationship. Trying to dominate your partner by shouting or screaming at them is common but a big danger sign. Mocking your partner or insulting them during conflict is another way to cause lasting relationship damage.
3. There are a few things you can do that are healthy when conflict arises. One of the first things you can do is take a breath. Breathe. This will help you to notice that we all often revert to the emotional age of 7-year-olds during conflict.
4. Notice that conflict often causes negative behavior. Adults acting like kids during conflict will yell, break things, cry, run away, and hurl insults. But you don't have to take it personally. The bad behavior is only for a few minutes, usually. See if you can begin to not take it too personal.
5. One powerful thing you can do is to keep the argument from getting too heated. Disarm and de-escalate it. You might say that you need some time to get yourself under control, then leave the room for a few minutes. When you come back, you will both be likely to talk in a more civil manner.
6. Also, once you've finished the immediate argument, don't withhold your affection. Don't refuse to touch or caress your partner for days just because they fought with you. This can end up killing your relationship.
7. Next, try to reconnect with your mate after the argument. Don't wait days to talk civilly to them again. Once things have cooled down, even if you don't think it was your fault, reconnect. Say "sorry we fought, are you okay?" Do not let the anger between you linger.
   

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